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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/27801571">A Little Indulgence</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff/pseuds/ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff'>ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>Criminal Minds (US TV)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Choking, Daddy Kink, F/M, Fic Swap Fic, Gen, Knifeplay, M/M, Post-Prison Spencer Reid, Reader is AFAB and uses they/them pronouns, Riding, Smut, Spanking, thigh riding</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-11-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-11-30</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-10 15:55:18</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Explicit</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>3,474</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/27801571</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff/pseuds/ontheoddoccasioniwritestuff</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>After returning home, Y/N discovers that Spencer has brought back something from prison.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Relationships:</b></td><td>Spencer Reid/Original Character(s)</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Comments:</b></td><td>2</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>29</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>A Little Indulgence</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="fff_chapter_notes fff_head_notes"><b>Author's Note:</b><blockquote class="userstuff">
      <p>This was part of the NSFW fic swap in @imagining-in-the-margins' (on tumblr) server! I wrote for my gorgeous pal @cardigayn (on tumblr) &lt;3 love you!!</p><p>Reader is AFAB and uses they/them pronouns</p><p>Content warning: knife kink, daddy kink, thigh riding, mild choking, spanking, biting, smagnst</p>
    </blockquote></div><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>The sudsy water masked the cutlery from sight, so Y/N’s hands were only submerged for a split second before they retracted with a gasp as sharp as the blade that cut them.</p><p>Spencer had acted fast; he found the first aid kit, deftly picking out the bandages in preparation for determining the right size. It had been his fault really. He was the one constantly sharpening the blades. He was never really satisfied with them, even when they could slice an onion without causing tears or rip through a cut of meat like it was wet paper.</p><p>The setting sun fanned over the room as Spencer’s nimble fingers wrapped cotton gauze around Y/N’s hand. They checked the pressure on the cut was tight enough. But they were moving on muscle memory alone. His mind had strayed to Y/N reaching carefully into the sink with their intact hand and retrieving the offender from it. Bubbles dripped off the edge, teasing him with its enticing appearance.</p><p>The second Y/N was deemed “fine”, Spencer left them alone. He ran for the bathroom and slammed the door. With the lock turned in, he stripped off his stifling clothes until he was free of his tie, his jacket, his shirt. Cold water splashed onto his cheeks didn’t calm him. The mirror fogged up beneath his nose with his deep breaths, in, out, in, out, his forehead against his reflection’s. His eyes were dilated, as he flexed his fingers over the crotch in his pants. A sigh from deep in his chest relieved itself. Things really had changed since Scratch.</p><p>He left the tap on to disguise any cry that might wriggle free from him. In all honesty, Spencer half wanted to weep that he was thinking of such things while his partner had injured themselves. He should be helping them, maybe leaving a quick peck on the bandage because Y/N once told him that a kiss on a cut defied science and made everything better.</p><p>His mind cast itself towards self-destruction and a horrendous link between himself and a young man he once knew. Nathan Harris, trapped in his mind, so aware that what he was feeling and thinking was morally wrong, but the poor kid still felt it and he nearly succumbed to it.</p><p>Spencer wanted to know if he was still institutionalised. Perhaps if he was more like Gideon, Spencer would have kept track of the victims their cases had come across.</p><p>Gideon.</p><p>Victims.</p><p>He wasn’t a victim. He refused. It was just a small cut from a kitchen knife. It wasn’t as if he was harming anyone. Yet.</p><p>He wasn’t Gideon. He wasn’t going to run away with just a note in his absence.</p><p>“Spencer?”</p><p>Three raps at the door, Spencer heard from Y/N on the other side. He forced one more slow breath out before he unlocked the bathroom door and ripped it open.</p><p>“Are you ok?” Y/N’s gaze dropped to his pants then back to his eyes – just for a second but Spencer noticed.</p><p>His voice was low as he replied, “I’m alright.”</p><p>As if in slow motion, his hand reached out for theirs. They noticed but did not make a comment at his speed. They let him take it, and his thumb grazed over the plaster that covered their injury.</p><p>“Are you?” He asked just as quietly.</p><p>Y/N looked down again, saw the strain in his trousers. Spencer watched them with cautious arousal as they connected the dots at lightning speed.</p><p>“I’m alright,” They said, their voice surprisingly steady as they strained to keep looking at his eyes, “Is there anything I can do to help you?”</p><p>They were so genuine. They wanted the best for him. They would do anything for him.</p><p>“Maybe not help.”</p><p>Confusion crinkled their brow, “What then?”</p><p>He should stop here. He should keep what his limits were here a mystery. He shouldn’t.</p><p>“Indulge me.”</p><p>And he pressed his thumb hard on the cut.</p><p>From Y/N, Spencer drew an inhale that was sharper than the knife that cut them. It fuelled his intentions, his other hand brushing their hair over their shoulder before it settled on their throat. It stroked gently, not forceful – for now.</p><p>Their body instinctively moved closer, barely an inch but it was enough to tell Spencer two things. One: Y/N was willing to let this play out. Two: their right arm was too far behind their back to be considered comfortable.</p><p>“What’s that you’ve got there?” Spencer kept watch of them as his hand slid along their arm, across their trembling skin until he found their fist holding the accused knife.<br/>His entire body slumped with a sigh against them. Carefully, he coaxed them to ease the grip and took the handle into his own power. He saw their throat wobble as they swallowed.</p><p>“You ought to be more careful with these.” Spencer held the blade up in the space between them, his reflection more assured now. Y/N was staring at it too, so lost in its splendour that their chest jumped in surprise when Spencer released their throat to fist at their flimsy shirt and pull them closer.</p><p>“You’re not particularly attached to this one, are you? Use your words.” He reminded them when they shook their head.</p><p>“No,” Y/N whispered and their stomach sucked in as Spencer pierced the shirt with the tip of the blade.</p><p>Their bottom lip shook and Spencer restrained his urge to bite it as he said, “You know I wouldn’t hurt you.”</p><p>“I do.” The knife began gliding up the shirt as though it were warm butter.</p><p>Spencer continued, “You know, unless I wanted to. Unless you wanted me to.”</p><p>Y/N nodded, barely though, “I do know.”</p><p>“Because you wouldn’t have brought me this if you didn’t know that. But you do. You know just what I need.”</p><p>The blade caught at the end of the shirt, stuck for just a second before it flicked up and broke the final links of fabric. The tip of the knife caught on Y/N’s chin and stayed there to sting it. They were shaking. One more shiver out of place and the skin would break but there was no tension in their shoulders or panicked panting. They were as collected as they could be with all their attention on the blade.</p><p>“You can’t take your eyes of it either,” Spencer sighed. He was almost jealous of it, but something about this knife was truly captivating. Right now, he was feeling like he was holding it for the first time again – because Y/N was feeling its effects for the first time.</p><p>His breath was agitated as he whispered to them, “Tell me you want this too. Please.”</p><p>“Daddy,” and Spencer felt his stomach twist with absolute joy as Y/N spoke, “I want this.”</p><p>His fist released them, and he watched the confusion cross their face. It was soon replaced with bashfulness as he shamelessly looked at their chest, drinking in how it was framed in the tatters of their shirt. A minor inner conflict ensued as he forced himself to take his time moving from the en suite to the bed, sitting up against the headboard. Once comfortable, the knife lolled in a controlled bounce between his fingers.</p><p>“Take that off. Come here.”</p><p>After a moment’s processing, Y/N quickly shed the shirt and took the initiative to remove the rest of their clothes. But not their underwear, they knew Spencer liked to be the one to take those off. They knelt over his lap, awaiting his next instruction. One that Spencer was all too happy to give.</p><p>“Get off on my thigh.”</p><p>Y/N took matters into their own hands when it came to wriggling off Spencer’s trousers and underwear, not even bothering to take them completely off before they straddled his thigh and began grinding against his bare skin. His cock rested against his belly, twitching at the occasional brushing up against the enthusiastic Y/N and leaking eagerly. As his own form of torture, Spencer refused to touch it or ask Y/N to do so. All he could touch was Y/Nand the knife’s handle. He pulled them closer with a hand on their hip. It guided them in their motions once they noticed the knife was at their throat, and their head leant back as they moaned, exposing more for Spencer to target.</p><p>Control after such chaos, it was just what he needed. As he dropped his head into Y/N’s chest and kissed the swell of their soft breasts, he lowered the knife. <br/>He controlled the danger Y/N was in, and they let him control it. They trusted him, even if he didn’t completely trust himself.</p><p>“Spencer? Daddy?”</p><p>Y/N touched their nose to Spencer’s, seeking out the answer to why his grip had slacked. He also noted that Y/N had stopped grinding onto his thigh.</p><p>Spencer gave into temptation and he bit down on that delicious bottom lip of theirs. It was sweeter than anything he’d ever tasted with the moan from their throat as a garnish. The knife rested at the slope of their neck.</p><p>He released their lip to murmured against it, “I could fuck you with the handle.”</p><p>Their nose bumping against his as they shook their head, Y/N whined, “No.”</p><p>“No?” Eyebrows raised at the audacity they had, to use him then deny his words.</p><p>But then Y/N opened their eyes, pleading with them as they said, “Next time.”</p><p>They were touching his hand now, the same spot where they had cut themselves and their bandage pressed into each other with their fingers linked.</p><p>“I want your cock in me now, and I want you to hold the knife against me. Please, Daddy.”</p><p>All sense of Spencer’s gorgeous hazel eyes was lost as two rings around his pupils. His jaw went slack as he processed their request, his laboured breath falling from his lips<strong>. </strong>Finally, he took in a deep breath, straightening up his back and resuming his role as the Dominant again.</p><p>“You’re getting really greedy, baby. You should watch your mouth.”</p><p>Y/N continued to plead with their puppy dog eyes, leaning close to him. Their bodies were pressed as close as they could be. Spencer’s trousers were still frustratingly in the way so he kicked them off.</p><p>Luckily for Y/N, Spencer was greedy too. The promise of “next time” is what let them off their backtalk this time.</p><p>He quickly unhooked Y/N’s bra, letting them be the impatient one to throw it aside. His sitting position adjusted itself against the headboard before he allowed them to sit in his lap again. Once comfortable, he dotted their chest with purple, the knife keeping their back arched into him.</p><p>Their panties were grazed by the knife before they were merely pushed aside and Spencer stroked through their lips with a tactile fingertip, sharing a groan from how wet they were. He could never tire of that, or of Y/N sinking down on him, how warm and welcoming they were, how they clung to him like a limpet.</p><p>Y/N began to move. Every motion was more longing and enrapturing than the last, Spencer finding it hard to keep up and hold back. His free hand continued rubbing on their thigh, spanking their skin and counting each one until the spot beneath his palm was red. Every time, Y/N gasped and jumped, the blade pressing harder into them.</p><p>“Touch yourself,” Spencer rasped against their skin. He leant back to make way for their clumsy fingers, rubbing at themselves covetously.</p><p>“Please, Daddy.” Y/N cut themselves off and their cheek found the flat side of the blade to press itself against, now warm from their flushed contact, “Can I cum please?”</p><p>“Yes, you can, cum for me.”</p><p>The need to meet them in completion overpowered him and Spencer abandoned the knife to grab them with both hands, fucking into them harder as they cried out for him. Their nails dragged across his shoulders and he welcomed the pain from each fingertip. It only spurred him to move faster.</p><p>“I’m gonna fill you up.”</p><p>Y/N nodded eagerly, their stamina waning before picking back up at the notion, meant in no time at all he was keeping his word. They beautifully reached their orgasm with Spencer’s fingers tight around their throat once more, bringing on his own orgasm soon after with their snug cunt milking his cock for all it was worth.</p><p>Using his grip on their neck, Spencer pulled Y/N down against his lips and slurred into their mouth, “Thank you.”</p><p>Then he lifted his hips up, enjoying the pleasure flaring up as he did so. His shuffling down the bed was lacklustre but it worked enough for when he fell onto his back. Bringing Y/N with him, he could feel his cock slide out of them and something warm and wet dribble onto the top of his leg. If only he had the energy to plug it back in there, push it back with his tongue. All he could do now was lift himself up a little, reach over Y/N and pull their underwear back into place. As Y/N said earlier, “next time”.</p><p>“Thank you.” Spencer brushed Y/N’s hair off their back, letting it tangle with his. “Thank you. You’re so good to me.”</p><p>“And so are you… D’you need anything?”</p><p>“I’m good, you?”</p><p>“Me too.”</p><p>As his arms spread out on the bed, Spencer’s right elbow found the knife again. Too late, it was sliding off the edge, a muted clatter against the carpet reaching their ears just moments later. A few seconds later, Y/N lifted off him, their sweaty skin clinging to each other as if to plead for them to stay, but it was Spencer who let out the noise of complaint this time. Y/N was quick though. They simply moved the knife into the bedside drawer and closed it before landing beside Spencer, wriggling to get that proximity once again.</p><p>Spencer found himself kissing the palm that cradled his face, breathing it in, plaster and skin and all. Soon he was curling into them, his face hidden in their neck as he wrapped his body around them. There were a few more grunts as sporadic pangs of pleasure rippled through them both, until they finally settled still. Y/N combed their fingers through Spencer’s thick hair, tugging just how he liked it.</p><p>He didn’t know really how to describe it. He just felt warm.</p><p>“Spencer?” Y/N’s voice was a little above a whisper, a crack chipping the last syllable.</p><p>“Yeah?”</p><p>“Would you…” They tilted their chin up to the ceiling. Spencer didn’t push; he gave them time, just as they had done, to answer.</p><p>“Would you let me shave you one day, please? With the straight razor?”</p><p>Spencer’s smile grew back on his face, “Of course.”</p><p>“And would you use the knife handle on me next time please?”</p><p>“Why were you more nervous about asking to shave me?” Spencer kissed where a faint ring of teeth marks met their neck, feeling it rumble with their giggling.</p><p>“I don’t know!” They covered their eyes with their hand.</p><p>To encourage them to come back out of their little shame cave, Spencer kissed where his lips fell and nodded, “Yes, next time, I’ll use the handle, Y/N.”</p><p>“We’ll have to make sure you don’t cut yourself.”</p><p>They cared for his wellbeing. He should too.</p><p>For now, at least, things weren’t so bad. Clarity from his orgasm told him that the guilt would set in by tomorrow. But he’d address it then and let the final dregs of their indulgence rock him to sleep.</p><p> </p><hr/><p> </p><p>
  <strong>BONUS</strong>
</p><p>Tonight was a transaction. Spencer was midway through his side of the bargain – keeping Y/N comfortable. They didn’t seem to mind the granite of the countertop pressing into their back as Spencer ate them out with gusto, his knees protected by a pillow against the tiled kitchen floor. His hair was tugged at the roots. Sometimes he felt Y/N’s heel tap against his back as they balanced on one foot to use the other to bring him closer. It was largely ineffective, but it pleased him that they weren’t completely in control of their needy actions.</p><p>His lips parted from theirs, and they whined at the cool gentle air he blew against them. They both knew that Y/N knew they weren’t allowed to cum without permission. They both knew that this wasn’t the end. But only Spencer knew where this was going next.</p><p>Leaning back on his heels, he pulled open the drawer beside Y/N. His hands were careful as they retrieved the knife he was after. He’d memorised its place in that drawer. Once again, Y/N was trapped in a stare. Their gaze followed the knife with confusion as Spencer began to wrap a hand towel around the blade.</p><p>When Spencer caught sight of this, he raised an eyebrow and waved the handle around in a circle. “You did say next time.”</p><p>A hint of guilt crawled around in his gut. Perhaps they would think he was pressuring them to keep a promise they made in a daze of hormones.</p><p>But Y/N simply whispered, “I did. I also said we’d have to make sure you don’t cut yourself.”</p><p>“I’ve thought about this already,” Spencer said as his fingers held the blade - safely encased by the towel.</p><p>“Me too.”</p><p>With his eyes as wild as his hair, Spencer moved the end of the handle across their sex, tentatively stroking it across where their cum and his spit met. Then he took a leisurely pace to push it inside them. His eyes fixated on the way they clenched around it, unconsciously wanting more while they restrained their other movements with stiff knuckles grasping at the countertop.</p><p>“How’s that feel?” Spencer said quietly, his hot breath hitting their skin as hard as the curves of the handle pressed against their walls.</p><p>Through their exhale, Y/N replied, “It’s good.”</p><p>“Yeah?” Spencer began pulling the knife out slowly once it reached halfway inside of them, “Not as good as me though.”</p><p>“No, never.”</p><p>
  <em>Right answer. </em>
</p><p>He pushed it back in, until the edge of the blade was an inch from their soaked sex. Then he released it.</p><p>“Spenc-”</p><p>“Stop. Keep it there. I know you can.”</p><p>The hand towel dropped, untangled and fell off the blade.</p><p>Spencer leant back again and watched how the blade quivered with them now, reacting to their body just as they reacted to it. “Careful now. If you don’t hold it still, you could cut yourself.”</p><p>Y/N let out a groan of frustration but they listened to his demands. Soon the knife was near still. There was still a familiar tremble that shifted it from inside of them, but it was nothing to worry about yet. Licking his lips, a hint of their taste still on them, Spencer reached out to their clit and began rubbing it. He delighted in Y/N’s groans.</p><p>“That’s it, keep that cunt tight.” Eyes still on them, he pulled out from his underwear his cock and stroked his hands in time together. It thrilled him to no end, his pleasure only increased by theirs. “Does it feel good?”</p><p>“Daddy, please,” Y/N bit their lip, unable to look at what Spencer was doing to them.</p><p>“Look at you, trying to keep that still in you, all tense, when I’m teasing your pretty clit. What’s it like knowing you want more but you can’t have it?”</p><p>They were struggling, the blade slipping out millimetre by millimetre despite their best efforts. Their hips jerked as they would when riding him. But their thighs were forced apart lest the shining metal between them bite worse than their Daddy. They were simply too aroused to do a better job, poor baby.</p><p>“You know how I like looking at them.”</p><p>Spencer leant close, breathing in their earthy smell, and he pressed a kiss on their clit. His lips parted for him to lick at it twice, to feel their most sensitive parts twitch against his mouth again. He looked at their face as his finger found the blunt tip of the knife and pushed the handle back up into them. Y/N’s mouth fell open, a ragged gasp shaking at the back of their throat. Spencer looked back at the knife just in time to see a drop of their cum slip down the edge of it. His cock twitched. His teeth bared in a smile.</p><p>“But this view is my favourite.”</p>
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